Ashanti’s Story

Posted on by Laura Green

When I found out I was pregnant, I was in shock and denial.  I kind of hoped that it would somehow turn out not to be true.  The same day I found out I was with my Dad Stillman’s Homecoming Game.  The whole time we were there I kept thinking, “What am I going to do?”  “How will I tell them?”   That night I sat by my Dad’s cousin and I remember her telling me that I was beautiful and not to ever fall for a guy that I would let ruin my life.  Little did she know, I had in some ways already done that.  I just sat there fighting back tears.  I’ll never forget that night.

            At the time I found out I was pregnant, my son’s father and I were not on good terms.  When I told him I was pregnant he told me he wanted me to get an abortion.  I knew abortion wasn’t an option for me, so I asked him to just sign over his rights to the child once I had it.   When I told him I was going to keep it, he said he’d be there for the baby because his own father had spent most of his life in prison.  Three days later I told my mom in a text message that I was pregnant and the following day I told my dad.  My Dad is the one person who has constantly been there for me, so telling him I was pregnant was one of the worse things I’ve ever had to experience. After I talked to him about it I felt better knowing that he was going to be there for me through it all. 

            It has been difficult being a teen mom and every day is a struggle.  I have to find babysitters to watch him while I’m in school, I have trouble doing my homework because I have to deal with him, and it’s also been financially tough.  But I think the hardest part of all is being a single parent.  After our son Jr. was born, the relationship between my son’s father and I became very unhealthy.  He became very controlling of me and before I knew it, I was the victim of domestic violence.  After that I knew it was time to end all ties with him. He’d never really learned how to love me or how to treat me, and I deserved better for me and my child.

            Through it all, Teen Moms has been there for me and Lauren, Mrs. Marsha, and the other girls are like my family.  Whether I need something for my son Jr. or myself or I just need someone to talk to, they are there.  Teen Moms has become more than just somewhere to go to escape from class, and the Bible study has really helped me to grow in my relationship with God.  Before I got pregnant I was longing for a relationship with God.  Even though I was raised in church, I had a lot of unanswered questions and issues I felt needed to be dealt with.  Teen Moms Bible study, talking to Ms. Lauren, and reading my Bible to get a better understanding of God has really helped me.  I feel comfortable asking questions that are on my mind and really opening up because it’s a lot different than your normal Bible Study.  My spiritual life is different now because I have opened up to God more and have made commitments to Him that I’ve actually stuck with.  I used to feel like I didn’t have anyone to help me but since being a part of Teen Moms, I don’t feel alone anymore. 

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